The narcissist’s smear campaign is ongoing, underground, and
relentless. You won’t know even half of what he’s really doing.
A few years ago, after I first split from my ex narcopath, I posted in a large forum where I was an active member and asked if anyone wanted to form a small, private support group for people who’d been abused by narcissists and sociopaths. I got some positive replies, so I went ahead and started the group, then e-mailed everyone who was interested. Half of them ignored me, and never replied to me again in the forum. I thought it was weird and moved on.
Over time, people started sending me messages saying that the narcopath had contacted them and told them to ignore anything I posted. I had the narcopath blocked, of course, but clearly, he was seeing everything I did online. Either he has fake profiles or a very dedicated gang of flying monkeys! At some points, he was stalking me in real time. One day a friend tagged me in a post and he was messaging them within a minute. That happened all the time and I started getting a lot of warnings about it.
I thought this was creepy because, as bad as the narcopath was, I never contacted his friends. I figured they were either fooled or they were just as bad as he was. Either way, I was never going to convince them that he was abusive, and it wasn’t my business to bother his friends, anyway. He did not take the same approach to my friends. He contacted them over and over and over. Sometimes he wouldn’t mention me, but he would start charming and flattering them. If it wasn’t my friend and was just someone I was responding to online, he smeared me to them so they wouldn’t want to become my friend in the future.
It got to the point where he was sending a friend request to everyone who joined the forum like there was some kind of race to “win” them before I might talk to them. I kept my friend list small because I didn’t want to add people just so I could fool and manipulate them. Still, I kept getting warnings from people saying that he’d contacted them within moments of responding to me, tagging me or quoting me on a thread. I wondered how many more people were just buying his games and not telling me?
Finally, one day I posted in the forum and asked, “just out of curiosity, has anyone received a friend request or a private message about me immediately after replying to me on a thread?” I got over *thirty* messages from people who had. Nearly all of them confirmed that my ex narcopath had sent them private messages telling them I was nuts and they should ignore me. I never mentioned his name publicly, but he was smearing me privately whenever I posted in forums seeking support for recovering from abuse.
He followed me into other support groups, and if it was a women’s group, he sent his female flying monkeys.
It still baffles me that anyone would believe a random message from a guy smearing someone. I never sent unsolicited messages to people to tell them to avoid my sociopathic ex! If I got a message like that, my first thought would be “why is this crazy guy sending me this message?!” Unfortunately, his smear campaign was broad and done in private messages for years. By doing it privately, he got others enraged on his behalf and rounded up a small group of nasty women who swooped in to trash and attack me regularly. BUT, because he was pulling their strings in the background, he claims he’s taken the high road by never saying anything publicly. That’s a sociopath for ya! Rationalizing their insanity any way they can! I’m sure I only know the tip of what was really done.
I finally had to close all doors to that forum where I’d been an active poster for years, but the good news is, getting rid of that toxic environment opened doors for me to find healthier interaction–both online and off!
10 thoughts on “Just an example of how obsessed a narcissist is with a smear campaign….”
WOW. I had a similar situation like this happen a few years ago. It’s crazy how gullible people are, but those are the ones who probably have been lucky enough to not cross the path of a Sociopath.
The campaign is in full affect for me at this moment….people I barely know have listened to his rants about me and then have contacted me because they are worried about my “drug addiction” that’s I guess the new hip thing for him to be saying…oh poor him having the mother of his children be such a looser and what a great dad he is to deal with it all…(not) …..I ask him and he rages about knowbody cares about my drama and why must I be coming up with some bullsh$@# and that he would never say anything…..then he contacts my sister and does the same thing and then my brother ..and we haven’t spoken in five years because he is close to one in the same as my current narc. Not to mention they hate each other so infinitely but their love for lies and hate for me is something for them to feed off each other in some twisted game….he denies doing so….although the phrases used in what has been said is exactly how he says it….I got him to admit to talking to them but only got some run around and lies….then he took my phone sd card and erased audio of his abusive behaviors….must have also loaded info to his computer….this is all just a small taste of what is going on right now….I intend to blog details soon….just gotta stay on my toes till I find a way out.
I have no idea what the ex is doing (he already publicly humiliated me and allowed the hyenas in his family to do most of his dirty work) but a neighbor who is friendly with (he has no friends even if he gives them that label) and who I was also friendly with, saw me last week. He normally waves and we speak for a second, but that day he didn’t wave and kept walking. Now I’m sure a person who experienced a normal, healthy breakup would think I was being paranoid. I can almost guarantee the ex has said something to this man. I believe it’s only a matter of time before someone tells me what he’s been saying.
They claim you can’t let go but you’d better believe they’re still running their mouths about you like the fools they are.
Had the same happen to me – they are relentless, and not only try to isolate you, have everyone think you are crazy, but can also get you into serious trouble! They certainly don’t hold back!
Urgent question the NARC I dont longer care for made a comment about how my daughter should be carefull cause this ppl Who steal from him and everyone else Will start kidnapping! Coming from him who hate me & looking for revenge cause I went to the authorities for psysical abuse and in this country police go to this men house to lock them in jail; so last december he spent hiding from the police for a whole mos! Also he is a pretender “The good Guy” in front of All ppl and circles “he gives away wheelchairs to old ppl” – he Will buy & take portable Air condition to ppl in jail – working hard All his Life for his mask in front of ppl making friends when this ppl are in need helping them – he is 75 and he is polished narc completely under cover lots of women like 12 children! So my question is are this subliminal threats are real ?! Should I take them serious?! Cause I call his lawyer and told him tell that man Who in my eyes is a criminal if he touch one of my children that he is the first and only responsable but those are just words please – I was kind of saying It because the law suit I made Must be file! Pleade can you answer me asap b4 the holidays starts I’ll apreciated! Thank u in advanced!
I am in the thick of a full-fledged hacking/stalking/smear campaign. This person (Narcopath) hacks my emails, my phone, reaches out to people I work with, it doesn’t want me to work or to succeed in anyway. Calls me a man, or says I have diseases on my hands & mouth & because folks believe this so readily, I suspect this person has some suspicious & sick looking ‘doctored-up’ photos of me that they show & display. This has been happening for 3-years now & I wish this person will go far away from me. I have ip addresses as proof & I went to the police, however, there wasn’t much they could do about it. All I can do now is hope this person & their nutty flying monkeys will find something positive to focus on in their lives, so they will leave me alone…thanks for listening.