I’ve blogged before about how narcissists are not interested in meeting their responsibilities or re-paying their debts. In fact, they feel entitled to take what they want and they don’t see anything wrong with that.
Today, I was flipping through TV channels and caught a bit of a show that really showed this quality. I don’t know if the person was really a narcissist or not, but it was definitely narcissistic behavior. It was on one of those court shows, (that supposedly has real judges and cases,) and the plaintiff was suing the defendant for $700 for a loan that was not repaid. I guess that’s not unusual, but it was the defendant’s attitude that really struck me. She has borrowed the money to pay her utility bills so she could get new service turned on in her apartment that she wanted to rent, so the plaintiff gave her $700 to do it to help her with a real need. But…so did several other people. I just caught the end, so I don’t know how many people it was, but this person had no problem asking multiple people for help paying her utility bills and keeping the money from all of them! She even told the judge that, and didn’t seem to think there was anything wrong with it. In fact, when the judge asked her why she took money from more than one person when she didn’t really need any more for her bill, she blamed the plaintiff for giving her the money by saying, “well she gave it to me.”
That’s right. In narcissist world, it is YOUR fault if you fall for their schemes, (which inspires me to write a whole other blog of first-hand experiences!) It’s as if this young woman thought if the person who gave her the money under false pretenses was dumb enough to do it, then it was her own fault that the defendant conned her and kept the money. Their logic is amazing, isn’t it? Perhaps the defendant wasn’t a true narcissist, but that is definitely a behavior and a thought pattern you will find with narcissists. They feel entitled to be treated in a special way, and they lack empathy. For us normal people, we wouldn’t think of doing that, and we would try to pay the money back instead of keeping it, but narcissists don’t think the way we do.
5 thoughts on “Narcissists have no problem taking your money and not re-paying you”
I believe my husband is a NARCISSIST but not sure. He fits some description of the traits but not all. Don’t know what to think.
I have recently ended a relationship with a narcissist – he clearly fits all the criteria. After he moved in he ate all my food (even my kids had to hide food), excessively used all my stuff (including my car), didn’t contribute equally, took my money and constantly pressured me to do things for his benefit. He got sacked from his job with no back up plan other than for me to provide for him and then made me look like the bad person for asking him to move out. He owes me thousands of dollars, made me spend thousands more on him, and now I have seriously financial woes. After I made him leave he kept pressuring me to see him, and I kept saying he needed to start paying back the money. That resulted in no contact, no money. I’m heart broken and feel so stupid and used. I know he has no intention of paying me back and will just go on to abuse others. It’s gonna take a while to heal and recover financially. They fool you with saying they love you, but really the only person they are ever capable of loving is themselves. If someone starts financially abusing you just accept that it is abuse, no matter what they say or what they make themselves out to be. If they have debts they are running away from and especially if they are not paying child support these are clear signs. End it now, stop all contact and never look back.
This is exactly how it is for me and my babies dad. Like exactly the same. He steals from my 14 year old and me as well. I’ve had to hide food too. It’s ridiculous
Narcissism is the hot topic these past few years! I am happy about it, because the world should be aware of these people. They think and “feel” in a totally different way from you…if you’re a kind and giving individual. Dealing with them is a mind&*(#!
I do not know about somatic therapy and narcissistic recovery having been yet studied or explored, but Massage Therapy might help some people recover after narcissistic abuse.
First and foremost, educating yourself about the narcissist is essential. Everything falls into place after that. (You mean there’s a NAME for all this? I;m not the only one? Wow!!)
Too bad they didn’t teach this in school as a requirement. We’d all have a better time in life.
When it concerns money, I think an apt summary of the narcissist’s viewpoint would be, “What’s yours is/should be mine and what’s mine is mine as well.” lol
They don’t seem to have much capacity for sharing fairly.