What makes flying monkeys so dangerous?

Do you think the narcissist isn't using you? Think again!For some reason, my first post on flying monkeys is my most read page ever. I guess we all hate dealing with the monkeys! For those who aren’t aware, flying monkeys are people that a narcissist manipulates into bullying their target. They will go after a third party and attack that person completely based on the emotional and dramatic stories they hear from the narcissist. Where there are flying monkeys, you can be sure a toxic person is behind them! They stand out most of the time because they are very abusive, they are very determined and they are very riled up and emotional. They will repeat what the narcissist has led them to believe. When there is a flying monkey attack on someone, you will typically see a sudden spurt of targeted bullying against someone by half a dozen or so people. Sometimes more. It is usually very venomous and filled with anger–even though the person being attacked has had nothing to do with the monkeys. They will all have the same rationalizations for their attack because they believe what they are doing is justified.

What makes them, and their controlling narcissist so dangerous is, they are completely run by emotions. Very strong emotions. They are so angry on behalf of the narcissist, that they can’t see straight, and they are oblivious to facts. Narcissists rely on emotion. When they are called out for something wrong they did, they will usually pour the victimhood on very thick. They will cry about how badly they’ve been wronged, how they are so sick and stressed out, how very abused they are. And…naturally empathetic people will jump on that. We hear sob stories and we want to help! Unfortunately, this vivid and dramatic display of emotion is created to hide what really happened. It is created solely to get pity, so people will feel sorry for the narcissist, and get angry and upset on their behalf. If people didn’t get caught up in the emotion, they might start looking critically…and the narc can’t have that!

When my ex sociopath assaulted me, he was arrested after he confessed. I went to the Emergency Room. After he got out of jail, he was the most pathetic victim ever! He told everyone how hard it was to be in jail, how awful it was to eat the food, how hard it was to sleep, how cold it was in his cell, how horribly mean it was of the police to arrest him, and more. People felt so sorry for him! Poor guy getting arrested, (again.) They really fell for it. At no time did he ever remind them that he was arrested for assaulting his pregnant wife. That most definitely would NOT play into his plans! The narcissist doesn’t want you to know what they did that caused them to “suffer” so much, but they really want you to know they are suffering, and they want you to get personally invested in defending them against the person they blame for their suffering.

People react to emotion, and when they are caught up in it, they ignore logic. This is why charismatic cult leaders are able to fool people into doing insane things…like drinking poisoned Kool-Aid. These types of people know exactly how to play on people’s emotions and gain their loyalty. They can be so effective that their followers will bully, kill or die for them in extreme cases. And so, when a toxic person gets people very invested in their emotional stories, the most invested people can easily become flying monkeys.

It is great for a victim to have friends who support them. But…it is not great to have friends who bully others on your behalf. If a third party flying monkey is getting that invested in someone else’s emotional story, there is most likely some manipulation going on.

6 thoughts on “What makes flying monkeys so dangerous?

  1. At working places they do nasty work for narcs just because they are scared of being the victms themselves. So they are perfectly aware that the victim is inocent but have to be flying monkeys for fear.

  2. I literally have chills running through me as I read this. You have described my friends experience of a Long working relationship with a company that you are describing . The owners would use you , abuse you , and then throw you away in the end. The CEO is a narcissist in every way you describe. I could go on and on ….. but why the chills you ask? …….. the name of the company is Flying Monkeys craft brewery . Ont Canada

  3. I have been living with a narcissist boyfriend for a year and half. I have gone through hell with him really really bad. In my situation I have very limited choices to leave him right now. It is painful enough to be under constant abuse from his part, but since last weekend after we went out with his favourite boss and his wife, I can see now clearly he has been manipulating these people against me to the degree that the woman his boss’s wife she attacked me verbally on how cruel I am towards this beautiful charming man…! not mention that she was constantly holding and kissing my boyfriend on the cheek saying you are the best thing has ever happened to us we are so lucky that we found you and you are so handsome so great and so on.. inflating and boosting his ego to feel h is the best, I don’t deserve him I may as f..ck off said the woman to me ” if you can not appreciate this beautiful man and if you can not obey him you may as well f..ck off and “leave US” alone!!??? what the hell..! leave us alone?? Omg since then I can’t even move thinking that night at their house three drunk people so angry of me specially the woman they could harm me if I didn’t agree with them.. I was in fact terrified the way she attacked me and my boyfriend looking at me and smiling.. and nod or her. I have to mention this as well we are now moving somewhere vey close to their house because my partner decided he wants to be close to work! I need to get away from him from these dangerous relationship these dangerous people..
    She was also telling me that I am craz, because I am not always agree with him, or from all the verbal, emotional, physical abuse I have threaten to go to the police! All this really give me the chill specially since this weekend.. I have come to understand dealing with him was one thing but I just can’t let his flying monkeys bulling me as well!

  4. Hi, my brother is a narc and I’m the scapegoat, my family are flying monkeys, apart from 2 siblings who sit on the fence and will not defend me when I’m being put down. In fact I don’t know what they think but they are not aware of the narc. One of the flying monkeys being my sister is unwell and I don’t know how to handle this, she has been quite nasty to me. I dont understand why not one of them shows me any support, I would’ve moved a mountain if they needed me, I don’t believe the narc would convince me to not to be there for the scapegoat, I would have to fi d the truth somehow. Am I different to them? it was me that exsposed the bastard and yet no one is there for me. Should I have no contact? Because I seem to take one step forward then 2 steps back because the flying monkeys attack due to the smear campaign. Leanne

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