Narcissists love to re-write history

Narcissists rarely tell the truth, but they are really good at lying and changing history so that their lies sound like truth. They use bits of reality, they transpose people and facts, and they come out with a story that sounds incredibly believable to anyone who hears it. When you get frustrated and try to … Read more

Narcissist mothers will make your wedding hell

Narcissist mothers are emotional terrorists, but they seem especially obsessed with destroying their daughters and daughters-in-law. Your mother is supposed to be someone you can trust, but narcissist mothers start female rivalries that are worse than anything you will ever experience from the mean girls at school. They will become your biggest bullies. They do … Read more

Brace yourselves! Mother’s Day is coming!

It’s coming. That day that those of us with abusive, narcissistic, absent or sick mothers want to avoid. We’re already seeing ads for gifts, heartwarming stories, loving posts, memes praising mothers…and we are already being shamed, invalidated, and lectured if we point out that not all mothers are loving. Mothers are the one group that … Read more

My mother never stopped trying to destroy my relationships

I’m nearing 40 and I have nightmares about my mother. How sad is that? They aren’t about physical violence; they are about the emotional smearing I’ve lived through my whole life. In my nightmares, my mom has always convinced her relatives that I’m a horrible brat. She’s told them untrue things about me and they … Read more

Narcissists will tag-team to attack you–their common enemy

Many of us have more than one narcissist in our lives. That’s the way it often goes. Narcissists are drawn to certain types of people, and they definitely recognize someone who has already been “primed” through previous abuse. So it’s no wonder that I grew up with a narcissist mother and married an even worse … Read more

Struggling without a narc is still better than being miserable with one

I am completely estranged–by choice–from my dysfunctional, enmeshed, narcissist-laden family. It’s really hard not having a family or a normal support system. It’s also a bit lonely on holidays. I’m a single mom, so I struggle without a bit of help, and I almost never have a day to myself. In the past, I cut … Read more

The problem with discounting and ignoring the teenaged child who tells stories of abuse

I know that those of us who are dealing with a narcissist can have all kinds of different narcissistic people in our lives. Many people who visit this page have a narcissist ex, friend, parent, sibling, boss…you name it. Unfortunately in society, the children of narcissistic parents suffer in a unique way, because they are … Read more

Narcissists collect people, but aren’t actually friends with their “friends.”

Long before I knew what a narcissist was, I was seeing very confusing behaviors from the narcissists in my life. I knew something was wrong, but I couldn’t put my finger on why it was wrong. One area that I found strange was the way my narcissist mother, and later my narcissist ex-husband treated the … Read more

Narcissists often target people who make easy scapegoats

I’ve had a theory for a while, that narcissists will often target people who have some problem that will make them an easy scapegoat. After all, if the victim has an obvious “deficiency,” it will be easier to pin all blame on the victim. Then, the abusive narcissist can pretend to be a victim and … Read more