What the court system has taught me about domestic violence

I haven’t been posting much lately because I have been in a great place in life. However, this post is going to be filled with frustrations. It’s not a happy post, but it is reality. There are a lot of us out there who are living with genuine terror, PTSD, anxiety, depression and more after … Read more

Struggling without a narc is still better than being miserable with one

I am completely estranged–by choice–from my dysfunctional, enmeshed, narcissist-laden family. It’s really hard not having a family or a normal support system. It’s also a bit lonely on holidays. I’m a single mom, so I struggle without a bit of help, and I almost never have a day to myself. In the past, I cut … Read more

Narcissists often target people who make easy scapegoats

I’ve had a theory for a while, that narcissists will often target people who have some problem that will make them an easy scapegoat. After all, if the victim has an obvious “deficiency,” it will be easier to pin all blame on the victim. Then, the abusive narcissist can pretend to be a victim and … Read more

Be careful about calling out the narcissist too soon

One thing I’ve learned in dealing with a narcopath, is that when you point out their bad behavior, it rarely stops the bad behavior, but it does alert them that something is wrong with it. Narcissists don’t care about doing something that is wrong, but they do care about how people see them, so if … Read more

Yes we should blame abusive parents for some of our problems

So this meme is circulating on Facebook. It brings very divisive reactions. Some people think it’s great, and that all adults should take full responsibility for everything that happens to them. I think that, while the idea is good–that of being accountable for your choices–the meme is completely wrong and ignorant for children of narcissistic … Read more

How a narcissistic parent treats the golden child vs the scapegoat

Aren’t I lucky? Neither of my parents was healthy and both were narcissistic in some ways. Yay me. While I was my mother’s only child, my dad re-married and had a second daughter. When he started his new family, I was discarded and kicked out of my paternal family as if I’d never been born. … Read more