Timeline of a relationship with a narcopath

I was thinking today that I might plot out a timeline of how a relationship goes with a Cluster B abuser. I am leaving out tons of details of abuse just to give a timeline of how fast the stages went. Things might go in a slightly different order, or at a different speed for … Read more

One of the ways we are more vulnerable directly after sociopathic abuse

Directly after I left the narcissist, I realized that I couldn’t trust any of our mutual friends. Immediately, my world got smaller. From the very start, I didn’t have many people I trusted. I’d already come from a narcissistic family, which was why I’d been so vulnerable to another abuser. I already had very few to … Read more

Narcissists will control you by abusing and misusing your time

 Narcissists want to control every little detail of your life. Even if it does them no good, they must be in charge. Even if it makes no sense, they must be in charge. No matter what you do, they want to be the ones pulling your strings. I used to find that my narcopath ex would … Read more

Gaslighting and manipulation at visitation time

I had to deal with the sociopath today because he visited my son this weekend. I hate those weekends! Sociopath has been testing boundaries lately by calling my phone to inform me of his visitation plans. Our court approved mediation states that he must email me by Wednesday and is not allowed to call me…so … Read more

Don’t let your guard down with a narcissist or sociopath!

Sometimes, disordered people can act normal, or even nice! Of course we already know this, because the narcissist was probably pretty good when we first met them, or else we wouldn’t have fallen for them, right? Even when they start showing us their true colors, we often cling to the good parts and assume the … Read more

Don’t Be Afraid to Hit Rock Bottom

As so many of us have learned, recovering from narcissistic abuse is not easy. It’s not a perfect path, either. There are ups and downs. There are breakthroughs and setbacks. It takes years. Sometimes you can feel great for a while, then BOOM! the narcissist notices and makes sure to restart the harassment and smear … Read more

What the court system has taught me about domestic violence

I haven’t been posting much lately because I have been in a great place in life. However, this post is going to be filled with frustrations. It’s not a happy post, but it is reality. There are a lot of us out there who are living with genuine terror, PTSD, anxiety, depression and more after … Read more

Narcissists will tag-team to attack you–their common enemy

Many of us have more than one narcissist in our lives. That’s the way it often goes. Narcissists are drawn to certain types of people, and they definitely recognize someone who has already been “primed” through previous abuse. So it’s no wonder that I grew up with a narcissist mother and married an even worse … Read more

The flip side to the smear campaign–the narcissist’s public image campaign

Many of us have endured the narcissist smear campaign. The abuser goes around projecting his or her own behavior on to us, playing victim, and trashing us to anyone who will listen in an effort to distract others from hearing the truth that we KNOW about the narc. And it works pretty well. Most people just … Read more